Blind Men and the Sinusoid

This is a story and has nothing to do with nothing.

Blind Men and the Elephant – A Poem by John Godfrey Saxe
Here is John Godfrey Saxe’s (1816-1887) version of Blind Men and the Elephant:

It was six men of Indostan,
To learning much inclined,
Who went to see the Elephant
(Though all of them were blind),
That each by observation
Might satisfy his mind.

The First approach'd the Elephant,
And happening to fall
Against his broad and sturdy side,
At once began to bawl:
"God bless me! but the Elephant
Is very like a wall!"

The Second, feeling of the tusk,
Cried, -"Ho! what have we here
So very round and smooth and sharp?
To me 'tis mighty clear,
This wonder of an Elephant
Is very like a spear!"

The Third approach'd the animal,
And happening to take
The squirming trunk within his hands,
Thus boldly up and spake:
"I see," -quoth he- "the Elephant
Is very like a snake!"

The Fourth reached out an eager hand,
And felt about the knee:
"What most this wondrous beast is like
Is mighty plain," -quoth he,-
"'Tis clear enough the Elephant
Is very like a tree!"

The Fifth, who chanced to touch the ear,
Said- "E'en the blindest man
Can tell what this resembles most;
Deny the fact who can,
This marvel of an Elephant
Is very like a fan!"

The Sixth no sooner had begun
About the beast to grope,
Then, seizing on the swinging tail
That fell within his scope,
"I see," -quoth he,- "the Elephant
Is very like a rope!"
And so these men of Indostan
Disputed loud and long,
Each in his own opinion
Exceeding stiff and strong,
Though each was partly in the right,
And all were in the wrong!

MORAL,

So, oft in theologic wars
The disputants, I ween,
Rail on in utter ignorance
Of what each other mean;
And prate about an Elephant
Not one of them has seen!

But then they went into the next room

The very next room had a sinsoid on the wall,
Sticking out a bit so it could be felt by all

Ah, what do we have here? quoth the climate peer
I feel a rapid rise, exponential, and quite queer
It will go up like a hockey stick
And the world will become very sick.

The second one felt the middle, and proclaimed quite loud
This is a straight line, which will go up forever, and agreeing is a 97% crowd
We'll use computer models to have our way coercing,
And input the same parameters that are self-reinforcing

The third felt the top,
I see nothing here to make us stop
Proclaiming the end of everything
So to get money, and lots of shiny bling.

ps.  I always thought this was not a story of stupidity, or even racist stupidity, but one of willful ignorance.  Those men knew there was an elephant in the room, but chose, for various reasons, to focus on what they believed in the first place.  :)