Dear Don, I know you want to increase fracking by 100 times or so. Then you can leave the whole Middle East to your Ruskie buddy. But I'm warning you, you'll unleash disaster for the whole Midwest if you don't do a bit of physics. And I really can't see you and the missus commiserating and organizing relief efforts. You never gave to charity in your life, and she would get her shoes scuffed.
Best that you nip this whole earthquake thing in the bud. I can do it for a mere million dollars, petty change compared to all the money you'll make as president. We just have to treat the water a little bit and all the earthquakes will go away, and you can frack to your heart's content.
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