Sunday, February 20, 2011

Evil Arkansas Earthquake Plot Continues

ATTENTION, MINIONS!  Last year we stole the moon, but this is even better!  We are creating a new giant earthquake zone.  It's in the middle of a bunch of creationists, so who cares?  But soon it will become big enough to threaten the Clinton Museum!  THEY WILL PAY!

The plan is simplicity itself.  Disguised as a simple Starbucks, we have strategically placed injection wells along a weak thrust fault.  All that we brew, we inject down 12,000 feet.  This has the combined effect of creating a pressure bulb, as well as eating at the rock.  The earthquake plots show our great success so far, and those locals don't have a clue!

As the fault gets bigger, we open up more Special Starbucks!  There is already a strike-slip tail going off NE, but soon we'll have one at the other end of the thrust, going SW, straight to Little Rock!  Our baby can already create M4's, but we are not happy with that.  As it grows, we'll get M5's, and when it gets as big as the Toronto baby, an M6!  As we speak, we are building a giant dam, so that our baby Frankie can feed itself, just like it's big brother up the valley.  Those local dolts think these earthquake zones are dead because there is no accumulating strain, like the west coast.  Ha, we'll show them!

Keep up the good work, minions.  Evil is, as Evil does!


Anonymous said...

Disasters=conspiracy theories. Better Starbucks than Starpeople...

Goodness me...NM zone certainly straddles the big river. Soils to become wibbly-wobbly pudding-stuff ?

What say you to a deeply buried active plate fragment in the Gulf of Mex. ?
First I've heard of that ( or the Wabash zone N.E. of NM so clearly I'm not up to speed ).

Are you suggesting the substructure is so weak that NEW features are being created or that they are stressing existing weakness ?

(note absence of tech-speak-I'm on shaky ground here haha).

Anonymous said... come I never got the certificate for MY share of the Moon ?

Harold Asmis said...

The injection of the special brew weakens the rock, which might have been happy for hundreds of years. Every earthquake on the thrust creates one on the tail, to keep geometry. It become easier to inject coffee as the process goes on.

Anonymous said...

thnx for reply !

So - we're adding additional weakness to existing (but so far "stable")weakness and increasing the potential for damage from an exogenous shock ?
As in possibly giving the New Madrid Zone a "path" to the Fayetteville gas-fracking area to the S/W ?
I'm sorry for being a geo-antbrain.
There seems to be more earthquakes in Arkansas coincident with fracking, as if fracking alone didn't have enough inherent concerns.

Harold Asmis said...

It is not the fracking, but rather the disposal of their evil brew, which may be somewhat worse than Starbucks. If they continue, they may open the fault to natural water sources.

Anonymous said...

Fortunatly, I was just in your archive, reading about fault ruptures & stress corrosion.
Oh my.
Fracking uses, & then disposes of, a LOT of fluids.
It seems dangerously circular - more small quakes; more fracking; more fluids; rinse and repeat and the door's always open to natural processes.

Harold Asmis said...

Yes, that's why it's such a lovely evil plot, even though I'm totally against it, and don't know how that guy managed to post on my blog!

Harold Asmis said...

I fear we cannot stop him! They are regularly hitting M4, and soon will be M5! This is exactly how New Madrid started umpteen million years ago.

Kraks said...

I quess you've been infiltrated.
Wasn't me.
I name me Kraks - 'cuz it sounds scary.
Wish I could find more on the Net about this that was original source and not lead-lined underpants crazy.
Any suggestions ?

Harold Asmis said...

You won't find anything non-crazy. I only put it in the context of a satire, so I can disavow it. As we speak, it grows and the earthquakes get bigger. "Never ascribe to conspiracy, what can be explained to stupidity." I have reversed that.