Friday, January 25, 2008

Toady flyer

My dog was chewing on this in the park:


ANGRY TOAD: NEWSLETTER OF
THE CANADIAN TOADY ASSOCIATION


We of the Toady Brotherhood have formed an association, to counteract and sue those who disseminate falsehoods about our profession, and to enact arcane legislation for self-glorifying featherbedding (just like the Doctors!).

Just like the fully qualified and competent Philippine nurse in Manitoba who fell afoul of their featherbedding, we will accomplish the same thing throughout Canada! It's best to have something different for each Province , in order to hide things better.

Our first rule will be: Canadian Toady's only! No American Toady's like Donald Rumsfield!

And we only spell it TOADY! And we're proud of that! Some commentators have spelled it toadie, but that's a sissification of the term.

And we shall have a Toady Certification Program, and only those with a genuine FoTS (Fellow of the Toady Society), behind their name can take the job offered by the Government of the Day (GoD).

The Duty of a Toady:

Always follow the whims of GoD.

Never do anything that will cause trouble for God.

Purge your staff of anybody who defies GoD.

If anything happens on your watch, just say "I wasn't aware of it."

Never publish any nasty letters from GoD.

And if, by some miracle, GoD gets destroyed, cause great trouble for the new GoD.

Now, we are sorry for qualified immigrant Toady's, but we crafted a Great Barrier to Entry, just so we can have headlines like:

The Toady Crisis Toady's Threaten to Quit in Calgary etc.

This will get more money for those of us already on the gravy train.

There are many new openings for Toady's, coming soon. The nuclear biz alone has about a dozen! Sorry, these are only for Conservative Toady's. Liberal Toady's will have to wait their turn. Sometimes, the GoD will appoint a 'Toady of a Different Colour', just to throw a fish to 'fairness', but fat chance with this one!

4 comments:

Harbles said...

Are u knot concered u may have "jumped the shark" as it were?

Toadie=..

Harold Asmis said...

Toadies are a secret society. They won't come out to kill me...

Harbles said...

Yeah but what about;
Warts?

Harold Asmis said...

Toadies won't give you warts! They just build up toxins for the next government!